Weren't you depressed?

Tonight I went to my first Lupus Support group meeting.  Despite leaving home on time, I arrived 20 minutes late because of traffic.  Being a little nervous, I knew that walking into a room of already situated people would be even harder.  Luckily, I had a good friend with me to help ease my nerves and keep my heart light.  
    Upon first scan of the room I noticed that I was most definitely the youngest there.  I was a little apprehensive at first.  The ladies (and one gentlemen) were already seated and finishing up the "light dinner" that was served.  The light dinner consisted of roasted potatoes, asparagus, chicken and some form of red meat with cheesecake for dessert.  Soda, water and coffee were all available. Since I typically try to avoid meat, I snacked on asparagus and potatoes while the meeting got underway.
    Our facilitator began by asking us to go around the room and say our names and what our illness was.  The meeting was not only for lupus patients, but also but arthritis patients.  One by one the ladies took turns and shared not only their names & illness's, but what current symptoms they were facing, or how they were diagnosed.  After listening to about 10-15 stories, it was my turn and I spoke briefly about having lupus for 10 years.  I was a bit nervous and unsure of what to say, so I told the members that they could ask me anything they wanted.  As the group moved on several women began sharing stories of their trials and tribulations.  It was nice to hear another group of women struggling with some of the issues I have dealt with.  Another younger member spoke up and asked me a question directly
 "When you first found out you had Lupus, weren't you depressed?  I was diagnosed a year and a half ago and I'm finding it hard to deal with"  Knowing this was a crucial moment, and my answer could inspire or depress this women further.  I began to answer her question as honestly and as best as I could.  I told her that when I was first diagnosed, I was 14 and didn't fully understand the extent of my illness.  It wasn't until I was older and started researching the disease on my own that I really found out just how serious lupus could be.  When I started learning more and more about my illness, instead of letting it depress me further I allowed lupus to give me a zest for life. I have good and bad days, on the bad days I rest.  On the good days I want to go out and enjoy!  In my response I stated that I also had antiphospholipid antibody syndrome, and had been hospitalized many, many times.  But again, instead of allowing this to bring me down, I am able to see what a blessing LIFE truly is. I really do try and enjoy everyday that I'm NOT sick.  Without lupus I may take life for granted, not realizing how beautiful the little things in life can be.  I was given this disease because I was strong enough to handle it, and I try to remember that when things aren't exactly easy.
When I finished speaking, about 2 minutes had gone by and I feel the members were truly impressed with my wisdom for being so young.  My friend leaned over and whispered "that was beautiful".  Knowing my message had gotten to some, I was relieved.  
The meeting continued long past the scheduled hours.  With the members telling funny stories or sharing one on one.  We said our goodbyes as we had a long drive back home.  I said I would see them all next month, and left feeling a bit better than when I had arrived.  


XoXo,
Jullz